Monday, September 12, 2011

I don't see you!

I've gotten back into bartending in a busy nightclub, and WOW did I miss it. I love not dealing with children, not having to be completely PC and sugar-coated all the time, but the thing I like best of all? Getting to know who's cheap and won't tip me regardless of service early on, and without wasting a lot of time on them first, and getting to outright ignore them as the night gets busy!

Think about it, the bar in a nightclub doesnt exactly have a single-file line, there's a crowd 3 people deep and as wide as the bar will go. Some insistent jerk who thinks getting their shots is more important than everyone else is probably standing inside the bar (just barely, right where the server's station is at the end of it), yelling because my back is to them (but I'll get to them anyways if they haven't stiffed me once or twice already tonight). So, if you're some uppity bitch who walked in with a chip on her shoulder already, and has been treating me like crap all night (snapping fingers at me, waving cash in my face as I'm making someone else's drinks, attempting to correct me on contents of drinks when she doesnt know shit, and of course, stiffing me), get ready to be ignored when I have a mob in front of me. She's most likely acting that way because she's insecure about her appearance and is threatened by the mere existence of someone even remotely attractive. Whatever her issue is, it's not my problem, and I hope she doesn't die of thirst waiting. I don't want to risk making the throngs of other people who MIGHT tip me angry because they had to wait behind someone like you.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011


Anyhow, I worked at a major chain restaurant... my old manager from one of my old bar jobs was managing there and got me the job.

One afternoon, we had a reso for 20 at noon. I don't know what idiot took that reso, the kitchen can't handle that huge of a party right in the middle of our lunch rush. They should have asked them to pre-order at least, or try to find out if they were on a time constraint... then they might have found out that these people were all from a nearby office building and only had an hour to spare, driving time included. Any idiot should have known they wouldn't be out in time, and that's where the problem lay.

The whole thing was seperate bills, and 6 extra people showed up after orders had already been taken, AND people kept moving seats... NOT helpful when you're trying to keep 26 tickets straight!! And of course, it took 30 min to get their food out from the time they ordered. They started bitching about 15 min after. I explained that the kitchen was a tad backed up, as the rest of the restaurant was packed and other people required food/service too. They weren't having it. As they paid their (separate) bills, one person bitched about me having to go to the bar for change, saying "i thought cash was always faster, thats why i went to an ATM on my way here!!"... um, yeah, cash IS faster when you say "keep the change"... not so much when you intend on stiffing me and don't have exact change. EVERY person stiffed me... I cant believe we dont have autograt for huge parties like that! I did overhear them saying that next time they'll have to go elsewhere because it was soooo slow (30 min ticket time for a 26 top is actually pretty darn fast, if you ask me!) so i got a bit of a smirk knowing they wouldn't be able to stiff THAT server, since all the other restaurants in the area do autograt for parties of 8 or more... i wish i could be a fly on the wall when THAT hissy fit goes down, because I guarantee the wait wont be any shorter at those restaurants either!

Besides the long wait time, there was NO reason to be unhappy. I was attentive with service, there was never an empty glass in front of anyone, modified orders all came out correct, I was friendly (until everyone was grumpy and unresponsive... then I was all about the silent service). I was ABLE to be so attentive because I had absolutely NO other tables... my attention was completely undivided. So when you stiffed me, that means I made no money at all. Actually, after tip out, i PAID $6.40 to serve your cheap asses. 

Bottom line? If you need to be back in the office right away, there's a McDonald's down the street. Oh yeah, they won't mind the ZERO tip either.